There is a moment in every woman’s life when she just knows. For me, I was 19. Though, I’m sure I was ready when I was much younger, but we don’t let women make hefty decisions in their youth, because, how could someone so young, be ready for something so big.
Even at 31, it felt like the entire world was trying to convince me otherwise.
“Are you sure you’re ready?”
“You’re so young.”
“Shame to let your beauty go to waste.”
“It is undoable, right?”
While the statistics show about 700,000 women do it yearly, with the median age being 33, I still felt misunderstood.
But that’s precisely what a tubal ligation is, isn’t it? Misunderstood.
Had I been talking about tying the other knot, no one would bat an eye. In fact, 31 might seem a little late in life to be getting married, which is obscene, if you ask me. There are states allowing for marriage at the age of 14, and yet, I can’t possibly be sure I don’t want children with my fully developed pre-frontal cortex.
I have lost friends over the matter, heard my father call childfree women, “mentally ill,” had doctors not return my inquiring calls, and sat silently, while people I barely knew told me all about, “changing my mind.”
AND, BITCH, I VERY WELL COULD.
But that’s the thing about full-autonomy: it’s mine. The fact-of-the-matter is, no one should have jurisdiction over a choice I make regarding my body. You’re entitled to your opinions about how I operate my life, obviously, but I don’t need to hear them. If I wake up 10 years from now and have a change of heart, that’s on me to deal with.
Tubal ligations are a reversible procedure, albeit costly and timely. Reversal isn’t 100% guaranteed, either. These facts I learned in research completed prior to even consulting with my obstetrician, who then reiterated. Dr. Huang also let me know there is a 1 in 1000 chance the procedure doesn’t work, and if that is the case, a potential pregnancy would be ectopic and life endangering.
If I wasn’t ready, why would I willingly endanger myself?
I digress, the reason I’m here is to help educate those of you potentially considering a childfree life. So, here’s the skinny:
There are a couple ways you can become sterilized. A tubal ligation is when the fallopian tubes are burnt, cut, or altered in a way that closes them off completely to egg and sperm traffic in the uterus. If you don’t know, ovulation is a period of time when an egg travels from a woman’s ovaries through the fallopian tubes and into the uterus; it’s usually when we can become pregnant. No fallopian tubes, no pregnancy.
There are also the completely irreversible options, like a bilateral salpingectomy, which removes the fallopian tubes, or a hysterectomy, which removes the uterus and ovaries; it’s up to you and your doctor to consult which one is best for you.
All procedures can reduce the risk of ovarian cancer, so those of you with the cancerous genes may benefit from these surgeries.
If reducing the risk of cancer doesn’t have you celebrating, a cost-free surgery might. Under the Affordable Care Act, female sterilization is considered birth control, therefore insurance will cover most, if not all, of the cost.
Aside from price, one of the biggest factors I considered when weighing my options was recovery. A tubal ligation was the most appealing, due to my active lifestyle and heavy work schedule. I wanted to be able to return to work (and play) as quickly as possible. With my surgery, I was advised to stay out of the sun, water, and gym for two weeks. I could, however, return to work within days.
Sex is also a no-go for two weeks in order for the stitches to heal properly. The incision occurred in my belly button, which would have made sex uncomfortable. Everyone has a different healing process, so always listen to your body and doctor’s advice. When you’re ready, you’re ready.
The other sterilization procedures had longer recovery times, due to more incisions. There is no right or wrong choice, simply what works best for you.
There is, however, right and wrong regarding health after a sterilization. A common fallacy is post-tubal-ligation syndrome (PTLS). No concrete evidence has been provided that the syndrome exists. There are claims from women (reported via Daily Mail) that their estrogen levels dropped, they grew hair in unnatural places, and a considerable amount of weight was gained. We all know how reliable of a source the Daily Mail is, so take what you read with a grain of salt.
Another claim via Reddit can be seen disputed in the comments.
Weight gain later in life is a commonality we all share, simply because our metabolism is slowing. If you are sterilized in your 20s, and then gain weight in your 30s, it’s because you’re slowing down, not because of your surgery. As for hair growth in places you haven’t had it, there are other underlying causes with medical proof: PCOS, for instance.
My point is, if you have any reservations about these surgeries, do your research. Asking your doctor, first and foremost, is an educated approach. If you feel like you can’t trust your doctor, here is a list of doctors that have completed hundreds of these surgeries. I am also available for any questions, concerns, and dialogue.
All-in-all, I have never been happier with a decision in my life; a weight was lifted off of my shoulders after coming out of my anesthesia-induced slumber. I feel lighter, walk with a higher level of confidence, and smile brighter knowing every day I made a choice for myself.
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